Dear Speechless,
Cheers for the letters. I get so few letters read to me these days – the mail truck turns up every day, but all the nice American & Eastern folk want to write about is wishing we a happy retirement. They are so considerate & warm.
That education policy idea of yours sound great – don’t know why I didn’t have someone think of it myself. I’ve got a friendly clown teaching me right now: for only one dollar I can get two patties, three pieces of bread, four people handle my food, and five kermits on the bunny.
What’s that? Sorry Spindly, advisor shouting at me now. Big Bird? Sesame Street? Oh, apparently I get five Sesame Street toys with my bunny. I’m sure you knew what I spoke – most people do, except that kid of Laurie’s who drank beer at a party. I think she might be Dickie’s kid, as I used to drink lots of beer too, could never give Laurie anything but beer to keep it happy. Same goes for the kiddies – maybe should’ve given them some of those spare guns we have around here. I thinks I... Consciousness... Dickie... was meant to do something with them, but can’t think what! I might sell them on Easy Boy. The guns I mean? Or was it the kids? Or was it the Constitution? Not important now, I’ll auction them all, as the Hulk says I need some cash.
Where were you? Yeah, the clown man that served my food has really been helpful actually – he’s at the end of my bed now, with a nice shiny balloon. Hee, Hee, nice balloon. Hey Clown dude, can I have a lollipop? And one for Gandalf too – he lives in a tent already; most of us won’t have to do that until you repossess all the trailers, Jenny.
The clown is dancing & smiling at me, and inviting me into the storm drains to find the Bin man I’ve been looking for for ages. Tells me It knows all about my budget deficit, as he’s wise with Pennies. I’m still happy with Count Duck on the Muppets though – he got me up to nine today, “nine losing votes, Ha Ha Ha.” I’m so excited, we might get to count with more than one number next week.
Oh, better leave it here Shergar, Benny & Earth are on the TV now. Pope Poppie told me they’re bad, and I should make laws against them. Something about them liking other persuading people.
Good luck in that thing you’re doing.
W
possibly skipped: did I mention I’ll leave the door open for Johnnie? Tell him not to worry about using a hatchet this time.
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